I hate

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 2:21 am

this anxiety shit.

And it's really weird that Linzy got it just before me, because I think everyone else is creeped out by what I'm doing. Constantly checking my pulse, complaining of not able to breathe. Oh my goddd without Linzy I think I'd be like dead. ;__;

Anyway, as of right now I'm in my room crying like a moron because I'm such a fucking kid.

I was supposed to see The Color Fred today. Been waiting for it to be announced since last year when he came a day after my birthday. Heard two days ago that he and City and Colour were playingn a free Myspace Secret Show here, in the best venue ever, Beat Kitchen. The place is about as small as my friggen living room & dining room put together, and my house is small.

I really hoped my stupid paranoia didn't bother me today, I reallyreally hoped.

I asked Linzy if she wanted to go, and she said it depended on how she felt. Which is good, becuase I'm not going, I guess

In science class, my first class of the day, we were doing our review from yesterday's hw, which I forgot to do, conveniently. After that, we were doing some stupid atom drawing thing.

While I was doing the drawings, I just... couldn't breathe. There's always a lump in my throat, but it felt sharp, all of a sudden. I made someone go to the bathroom with me so I could just stnad in there and breathe. And when I got back, it was almost time to go. But I still felt dizzy and was still checking my pulse, and almost started fucking crying then and there because my pulse was so quiet and slow. And my friend Greg came by, felt my wrist, and he's like, "Dude, she's dead. LOL@CHUUU

"

...And that didn't make me feel much better.

So next was Social Studies, and we had a nice sub, so I asked her to let me get water because I couldnt breathe. It made it worse so I jsut went home.

Thus, I cant go to The Color Fred.

and as i type i'm still feeling my pulse.

how 'bout someone calms me down and convinces me your heart can't just stop?

by tea-boy. Fri 30 Jan 2009, 2:26 am

The only possible way your heart could immediately stop is if you had a heart attack or something of the nature.
Being able breathe in space is more likely than a thirteen year old having a heart attack.
-loves-

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 2:28 am

Something weird happened earlier in the month, that's why I've been so paranoid.

I hate 203854

by tea-boy. Fri 30 Jan 2009, 2:33 am

I'm sure everything will be fine.

When you need to relax, try closing your eyes and taking deep breaths until you calm down. you have pleased him

If that doesn't work, there plenty of other anxiety relievers you could use.

-loves-

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 2:49 am

So, wait, it just can't stop if it was going slow, quiet, etc?

Because that's what usually gets me. >_<

by tea-boy. Fri 30 Jan 2009, 2:52 am

No, I'm pretty sure it can't.

And in a heart attack, you'd know it was happening.
I believe you get immense pain on the left side of your body.

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 2:59 am

XD I know that, hehe.

-loves-

ThankyouMeggg <3

by tea-boy. Fri 30 Jan 2009, 3:02 am

You're welcome Jenna.
ily. -loves-

by **LADIES AND GENTLEMEN** Fri 30 Jan 2009, 7:34 am

Actually, for a heart attack it's in the centre of your chest radiating outward.

It doesn't normally hurt right away. It's (from what I've read/been told, I got educated a lot when I was bulimic) as if someone's pushing their foot hard on the centre of your chest, getting harder and harder.

But, if you're seriously worried about your heart, even without any conditions that would make heart attacks likely, you should tell someone. They can do basic checks to see if it's okay; an ECHO to see if anythings been damaged or an EKG to test for reoccurring issues.

But, in a heart attack, even a small one (in which only part of the heart stops working) would almost certainly cause you to lose consciousness entirely.

If it helps, Jenna, I've had something really similar, because I have extremely low blood pressure. For about a week I couldn't go out because the dizzy spells would pretty much have me just collapsing. It randomly stopped before I got a doctor's appointment, but I suggest you do go to someone, even if it's just a precaution or to put your mind at rest.

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 7:44 am

Thanks Mikey -loves-

Yeah, since those doctors didn't take me, I'm going next thursday. It's going to be a nightmare until then. >__>

Trust me, I complain to my mom about it, but the only people who'll take me right away is basically the ER, which is really stupid. And she says it's too expensive, so that's where more anxiety comes in. >___<

[/whine]

by Jack Skellington Fri 30 Jan 2009, 7:46 am

Whatever Jenna. If something isn't right, you should get it checked right away.

Bad example, but after I stubbed my toe 6 times, I had broken it. >.< So, before it gets worse, let's help it get better.

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 7:49 am

I can't right now, it's too expensive to go back to the ER. I hate 203854

by Jack Skellington Fri 30 Jan 2009, 7:57 am

NEW FUND.
The Jenna Fund To Let Her Go To The ER To Get Her Heart Checked Fund.

GO! i r pleased.

by **LADIES AND GENTLEMEN** Fri 30 Jan 2009, 7:57 am

Don't worry. Parents have places they pull money from when they need it.

If it worries you a lot though, you should find out which of your teachers are trained in CPR (or have whatever the qualifications are there). Like 75% of the teachers at my old school were.

It's not like you'll need it, but it's good reassurance to know that if something did happen, you'd have someone there who was qualified to fix it.

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 8:03 am

Hahah omg, you guys are amazing.

Good idea. Mikey. (: And i don't quite know what it's for, but i think it's relevant that we have a defibrillator in the hallway. whatnow? O_O

haha.

by Jack Skellington Fri 30 Jan 2009, 8:06 am

Jenna. it's your blog. I think you're allowed.

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 8:08 am

Muahaha~

by **LADIES AND GENTLEMEN** Fri 30 Jan 2009, 8:14 am

Yeah okay you don't even need them to be trained in that case, apart from being trained in using it

I was thinking good old mouth to mouth keep your lungs going trained; thats all we got here.

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 8:20 am

Are you better now, though, Mikey?
Yeah, I remember you saying about being dizzy and I was all OMG NO D:

by tea-boy. Fri 30 Jan 2009, 8:30 am

testosterone boy wrote:Yeah okay you don't even need them to be trained in that case, apart from being trained in using it

I was thinking good old mouth to mouth keep your lungs going trained; thats all we got here.

They made us take a CPR course here in case someone choked in school. whatnow? O_O

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 8:31 am

We have, like, a sign in the gym. xDDD

by tea-boy. Fri 30 Jan 2009, 9:00 am

We had to do it on these really fucking creepy mannequins. whatnow? O_O

They were gonna eat me, I swear. LMFAOOO

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 9:01 am

Mannequins were all MEG OM NOM NOM

by tea-boy. Fri 30 Jan 2009, 9:04 am

Adrisole Q. Kazoo wrote: Mannequins were all MEG OM NOM NOM

YES.

Wouldn't you be scared of mannequins with creepy eyes and devil smiles planning to I hate 61336

your brain?
COLON HORROR!

by Adrisole Q. Kazoo Fri 30 Jan 2009, 9:06 am

xD Ohyes.

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