(c) The Pretender - R

Chapter 1

Frank's POV

As I leaned back in my chair, I looked over the top of my coffee mug at my friend of four years, and decided to reminisce about the events of the week before.

"So, Gerard, graduation was... interesting, huh?"

He blushed. "Yeah, I probably could have chosen a better time to come out..."

I giggled, "It wasn't so much the timing as it was the way you said it straight into the fuckin' microphone! HA! I'll never forget the looks on everyone’s faces... Were your parents okay with it?"

"Yeah, my mom was, but my dad didn't really say much about it... I mean, they're not homophobes or anything... Mikey said he knew I was gay before I did!”

I laughed. We all knew before Gerard did.

"So what're you going do now?" I asked, finishing my crappy coffee.

"Well Frankie-doodle, I was thinking about maybe taking a year out then going to Art College or something... You're taking a year out too, right?"

EARLIER THAT WEEK...

"Hey sugar plum, whets a nice boy like you doin' in a place like this?" Some random stranger asked me sleazily me before vomiting violently against the wall.

What was I doing here? I honestly didn't know...

I was standing in a back alley behind a gay club called XRJ. All I knew was that I had seen an ad in the paper for a bartender, and that I needed some money to pay for my crappy little apartment.

I took a deep breath, and walked in. Immediately, I was hit with the smell of smoke, alcohol and sweat. Oh, that's right... I knew I'd heard of this club before.

It was in the 'bad' end of town for a reason.

At the front of the dance floor, was a sort of stage. There were three poles, with three men sliding up and down them, dressed in what can only be described as... you know what, I'm not sure I really want to describe it!

Let's just say, being bisexual, I had a pretty good view of something I kinda liked the look of...

No. I'm just here for a job, nothing else. I don't wanna become one of the sleaze bags that were rubbing themselves against the pole-men, groaning and stuffing money where ever they could...

I saw a set of stairs, and decided if the manager’s office was anywhere, it would be up here.

I was right. I knocked on the small, cheap wood door, before going in. A small, beady-eyed man sat there looking at me over the edge of a dirty magazine as I walked up to his desk.

"Hi, I'm Frank Iero, about the bar tending job?"

"Ah, I was wondering when you'd show,” he said, looking me up and down like he was mentally undressing me.

He smiled thinly. "Say, Frank, whaddya say about getting a better job than just a plain old bartender? It pays almost five times as much, if you're any good..."

I nodded eagerly. "Yeah! Sure, what's the job?" I asked, wanting to know how I could possibly get that much money.

He looked at me in the same way as before. "Frank, what... sexual orientation are you?"

I blinked at the strange question. "Uhm, I'm bi, why?"

He smiled again. "Frank, I want you to be one of our dancers..."

I smile at Gerard. "Well, Geetard," I laughed, knowing he hated being called that, "I'm not really sure, but yeah, I guess I'm not really doing anything for a while... I need to find myself I guess..."

I knew I shouldn't lie to one of my best friends, but I also knew, that if he found out where I went nearly every night, he probably wouldn't want to be one of my best friends for much longer...

"Did you just call me what I think you did?" he asked, mock growling. "That's it, we're taking this outside!" And with that, he grabbed my elbow and dragged me out to the parking lot where he'd parked his beat up old black Mustang,

But, instead of getting into the car, he roughly shoved me onto the grass behind us, straddling me as he started tickling me mercilessly.

"Ah! Gee, please stop! Okay, I surrender, I'll never say it ever again!" I screamed and laughed, not caring we were getting odd looks from passersby and that this probably looked kinda weird...

After a few more seconds of torture, he rolled off me, so we were lying next to each other on the cool grass.

I glanced over at him, and found him gazing at me with a look in his eyes I'd never noticed before.

Looking into his deep, hazel eyes, I suddenly found myself overwhelmingly attracted to him.... I knew I couldn't do anything though; we're just friends, after all.

Then, without warning, he shifted so that his face was directly above mine.

"What?" I asked softly.

"You know, for a smart guy, you're pretty dumb..."

And, with that, he pressed his lips softly against mine.

Chapter 2

Gerard pulled back with anxiety in his eyes, questioning whether I enjoyed it, or whether I was going freak out at my best friend for kissing me.

At that point, it could go either way. Should I tell him that I loved the kiss? That I felt the same way and wanted more?

Or should I tell him that I just want to stay friends, so that I can protect him from myself, and my dirty secret that I knew would destroy any relationship I had, if anyone found out.

I never was any good at making the right decision

I smiled gently, as I tilted my face up to his. “I never realised...,” I whispered, before kissing him again, harder this time, running my tongue along his bottom lip feverishly, gasping as he grabbed my thigh, trying to pull me closer to him, groaning softly.

I pulled away, and saw hurt flashing in his eyes.

I’m sorry

“Sorry,” I said quietly, knowing he wouldn’t realise why I had pulled back so suddenly.

It just feels so wrong...

“It’s okay, I mean, I don’t wanna rush things either,” he smiled, sitting up.

To know that just last night, other people were touching me the exact same way; people that I didn’t know, people that just wanted cheap thrills, to rub themselves against me because it turns them on so much it hurts... people that aren’t you .

I smiled back, letting him think that that was the reason I had pulled away... not wanting to give away anything of how I was really feeling.

so dirty...

“So... what now?” he asked, scooting closer to me on the grass. I rested my head on his shoulder.

“I don’t know...,” I said, standing up and pulling him up with me.

“Do you... DoYouWannaBeMyBoyfriend?” he asked quickly, nervously.

I grinned, “Of course”

He breathed a sigh of relief; apparently, he had been expecting me to say no. As if.


****Time Elapse****



“Bye!” I waved to Gerard, who was getting in his car after spending the afternoon at my house; I had moved out after graduation, after my parents had told me I ‘needed to get used to being independent, because they sure as hell weren’t gonna support me for the rest of my life.’

Lovely, isn’t it?

Gerard and I had spent the afternoon curled up on the couch, realising how great it felt to be around each other, and be openly attracted to each other. We watched cartoons and other random shit, not really paying much attention.

I sighed as I shut the front door to my crappy apartment, knowing where I would have to go next if I wanted to have heating and electricity this month. I walked over to my closet, and reached right to the back, where I hid my ‘costume’.

I put it on, and went to the bathroom to fix my hair and make-up, knowing how many customers preferred the ‘rebel rock-star’ look.

When I had finished, I put some normal clothes over my costume so that I could walk there without getting abuse hurled at me, and walked out the door to the sick hell that is the best job I’ve ever had.

Chapter 3

15 minutes into my dance, and I’m surrounded by horny old men, all wanting the same thing. I’m sweating like a pig, but they love it, ‘cause it means I’m slippery, and therefore easier to rub against.

A tall guy in front of me licks my bare chest, but instead of cringing and moving to the other side of my pole, I smile seductively, knowing that’s how he wants it.

He grabs my behind, forcing our groins together as he grinds against me, groaning as he stuffs money anywhere he can fit his dirty fingers.

I pull away as his lips start to trail to my face, and I shake my finger at him. “Naughty boy,” I murmur. Kissing is something I refuse to do; it’s too personal, and I prefer to keep my customers at a distance, knowing that if I don’t, they’ll try to go even further than kissing.

Hell, I’ve never had sex with a man, and I sure as hell don’t want my first time to be with some random guy up against a greased pole. He growls, and moves towards me again.

“You know you want it,” he says into my ear, once again grabbing my ass.

Luckily, I’m saved by another man, who shoves him outta the way, yelling over the music, “Back off, it’s my turn with the front dancer!”

Oh yeah, did I not mention I was promoted to ‘Front Dancer’? It basically means that I was deemed good enough to take the centre pole, where all the most horny men go, ‘cause they know that I’m there for a reason. The reason being, quite simply, I’m damn hot.

I sighed inwardly, knowing it was gonna be a long night...






When I got home, I was still smiling from being with Frankie all afternoon.

I wasn’t really surprised about the way he pulled away earlier when I grabbed his ass; I don’t want to rush things – I want this relationship to work just as much as he does. It’s just that... I swear when he smiled at me, I saw something in his eyes - He looked doubtful, and that’s the last thing I want him to feel about this. I decided to call him – I missed him already!






I got home at around 1:30 am, exhausted and stinking of sweat – most of it not even mine.

I immediately stepped into the shower, turning it up so that it was boiling hot, eager to burn away the memories of the evening. I hated the job, really I did, but every time I came home with over 500 dollars, I knew I simply couldn’t afford to quit. I knew that if Gerard found out about it, it would ruin what we have together. But as I said, I simply can’t afford to stop.

As I continued scrubbing at my now raw skin, I felt a tear run down my cheek. Why does everything always have to get screwed up? I didn't mean to keep it all a secret. I knew it woujld be better if there was nothing to hide from anyone. But...I couldn't tell them.

I stepped wearily out of the flow of water, wrapping my towel round my waist. Walking into my bedroom, I saw that I had an answer-phone message waiting.

I hit the play button.

“Hey, Frankie, it’s me, call me back when you get this. You’re probably asleep on the couch or something, so I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, unless you wanna avoid talking to me some more that is. Bye Frankie!” said Gerard’s voice over the speaker.

I felt a pang of guilt, knowing he was only joking about the ‘avoiding’ thing, but still feeling awful about missing his call. I decided to ring him back in the morning. Right now, I’m too tired to even think straight, let alone talk.

As I put on my black pyjama pants, I brushed my hand over a bruise that was forming on my hip from when I went at it a little too vigorously against my pole.

That was gonna be tricky to explain. Maybe I could say I fell down the stairs... or... I could...

I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

Chapter 4

I remember just a few years ago really, when I was so innocent. I had no idea about the hardships of life; sex, drugs, alcohol, trying to pay the bills on time.
I suddenly felt the weight of the world fall on my shoulders as I rolled over to turn off the annoying buzzer of my alarm clock, which was telling me it was 9:30 – time to get up.

Last night I got at least enough money to pay the water and gas this month.

But even money comes at a higher price than is fair to pay.

Wincing as I swung my legs round, which were still aching after my vigorous efforts last night, my first real thought of the day was Gerard.
I reached for the phone, dialling the number that was now so familiar to me, and waited patiently as the phone rang once, twice, three times – “Hello?” A voice came over at the other end of the line.

I smiled at the sound of his voice; he had obviously just woken up.

“Hey Gerard, it’s Frank, how ya doing?”

“Hey! Frankie! Yeah I’m good thanks. You got my message from last night then?”

I felt a pang of guilt, and I blushed slightly, even though he wasn’t even near me.

“Uh, yeah I did. Sorry, I must have dozed off on the couch or something,” I lied, finding it surprisingly easy.

“Yeah, I thought as much.” I could hear the smirk in his voice. “So, anyway, I was wondering if maybe... you wanted to go out or something... you know, like a...date?”

My heart fluttered. I was being asked on a date by my best friend! Wow.

“Yeah! I mean, sure, sounds great,” I said, tried not to sound too excited...

“Where do you wanna go?” I asked.

“Um, I was thinking Stacy’s, at around seven?”

Stacy’s was a well known, but small diner near the town centre.

“Sounds great Gerard, I’ll see you then.”

I’m sure he could hear the insane grin in my voice...


Gerard and I sat opposite each other in the diner sipping at our cokes.

“It feels so good to finally be out on a date with you...,” Gerard said, smiling slightly shyly.

I grinned at him, and moved my hand across the table to touch his. “Yeah,” I said softly.

Gerard smiled at me, and looked into my eyes. I felt a romantic moment coming up, when suddenly his eyes glanced over my shoulder at the sound of a loud voice.

“Hey Gerard!”

Gerard smiled widely, and stood up to hug the guy who yelled his name.

I felt jealous as they embraced, but stood up to introduce myself.

“Bert, this is Frank,” Gerard smiled, turning the man around to face me. I brought my hand up to shake his, but froze when I saw his all too familiar face staring back at mine.

Sweaty palms running up and down my legs, begging me to come off the stage to join him.

“Frank?” Gerard asked worriedly, as I saw a flash of recognition flash through Bert’s eyes.

I saw the wad of cash in his hands, and gladly jumped down from my platform to join him.

“We’ve met...,” Bert said quietly, a smirk on his face.

I shoved him down in a bench at the edge of the room, knowing how most liked it rough and unemotional, and knelt down in front of him as he moaned in anticipation...

I gulped.

Was he about to give away my secret?

Chapter 5


Bert winked at me.

“Uh... Frank? You know Bert? How?” Gee asked, sounding slightly worried when he saw Bert’s not-so-subtle wink.

I stuttered, trying to think of something to say, but Bert got there before me.

“Long story, Gee. Why don’t I explain over coffee?” he said, still smirking as Gerard looked back and forth between us, confusion etched onto his face.

I finally found my voice, smiling tightly at Gerard. “Yeah, I’ll go with Bert to get some coffee, OK?”

Gerard nodded, still unsure of what was happening. Bert started walking to the counter round the corner, and as soon as we were out of Gerard’s sight, I grabbed Bert’s elbow, and dragged him over to the men’s bathroom.

I checked under the cubicle doors to make sure no one was listening, before I turned to face Bert, my face red.

“Look, can’t you just go? We’re on a date! Our first date,” I said in a hushed tone.

He grinned, realisation dawning on his greasy face.

"Gee doesn’t know that you-"

“No! He doesn’t, and I’d really rather it was kept that way,” I said angrily.

“Dude, chill, ‘k? It’s not like I’m really want him to know that I was one of your ‘customers’ either! Why don’t we go out there and pretend nothing ever happened, before he comes looking for us, and finds us in the men’s bathroom together!”

I nodded, knowing Bert wouldn’t tell Gerard anything, and walked out the bathroom, followed by Bert.

“Frank? Bert?”

I looked up and saw Gerard standing in front of us.


“Frank?” Gerard looked at me, smiling strangely, frowning slightly.

"Gerard I-" but before I could stutter my excuse, Bert, once again, got there before me.

“Hey Gerard, Frank was just showing me where the bathroom was. You still want that coffee?” He said, rubbing his hands together and smiling.

“Oh... Okay. Thanks Bert, but maybe some other time, yeah? I was thinking Frankie and I could go somewhere else, because we were kinda on a date. No offense, but I’d rather not double date with you and your invisible girlfriend,” Gerard replied, grinning as Bert punched his shoulder playfully.

“Aw come on! You know I’m irresistible...”

“Sure Bert, whatever. Come on Frankie,” Gerard called as he took my hand and opened the diner door for me, leaving our cokes, unfinished, on the table.




It soon became dark, and Gerard and I walked along the sidewalk quietly, hand in hand.

“Hey Frank?”

“Yeah, Gerard?”

“You never did get round to telling me how you know Bert...”

I gulped. “Uh... I think we met at a party or club or something...,” I replied. It’s not too far from the truth, right?

“Oh... right, Okay. Well, what did you wanna do now? I mean, shall I walk you home?"

I glanced at my watch, and did a double take. 9 o’clock! Shit, my shift started in less than an hour.

What if Gerard wanted to come in when we got to my flat?

“Uh, actually I have some... work... to do at home. We’re nearer to your place anyway, so I’ll walk home by myself, okay?”

He looked startled. “Oh! Right, of course. Yeah. Well. I’ll call you tomorrow then, OK?"

I nodded, smiling at him reassuringly, and turned to walk in the direction of my house.

“What, no goodnight kiss?” I heard his voice behind me.

I turned back to him, grinning as I walked closer to him, until I was barely an inch away from his lovely face.

I kissed his cheek.

“First date rules, Geetard,” I whispered, before walking away and leaving him standing on the sidewalk, touching his cheek.